sexyscholar: (Watchman - You know what to do.)
[personal profile] sexyscholar
I just came back from seeing "Watchmen: The Adrian Veidt Story" for the THIRD time.

Srsly. I need help.

[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite and I are each other's enablers. That's all I have to say.

[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: Let's go see Watchmen again.
Me: :HAS SPAZ ATTACK: 'K.



/arrive at the theatre and convince the ticket lady that yes we indeed want to see Watchmen, even though it started 35 15 minutes ago/

Me: DID WE MISS THE STUDIO 54 SCENE?! SHIT!
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: :checks fangirl script: I don't know; I can't read this shit in the dark!
Me: :EPIC SADNESS:
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: Wait -- there's hippies! It's only the 60s!
Me: OH THANK GOD. Yes yes, Jon's a starman, Andy Warhol's on minute 9, where the hell is-- OHHHHHHHH.
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: Holy shit; it's Ziggy Stardust! :whips out notepad:
Me: OZY JUST SHOOK ZIGGY'S HAND. I BET YOU THEY'RE GOING TO FUCK AFTER THIS. COVERED IN PURPLE GLITTER.
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: And spandex.
Me: THAT'S HOT.
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: :scribble scribble:

/Ozy goes away, leaving us bereft/

Both: :'(

/enter Dr. Manhattan's big blue project/

Me: Okay. So he's bald, there's no pubic hair, no pit hair... why does he still have eyebrows?
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: Beats me. :scribble scribble: Thin white dukes... :scribble scribble:

/cut to Adrian's big shiny office/

Both: :hearts seize:

Me: See what I mean about the windows?
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: I think he hangs to the left. :scribble: Huh?
Me: WINDOWS, WOMAN! :makes a note to buy a good set of binoculars:
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: ...And the headboard should go about there.

/graphic near-rape scene/

Me: Is it bad that I find this profoundly arousing? Put down the pad!
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: Huh? Wha--oooh. No, I don't think it's bad at all. Unbuckle faster, damn you!
Me: Hooded Justice, if you're not going to join in then you need to bounce.
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: Grab the rope!
Me: Now it's a PARTY.

/funeral scene... Jon remembers fondly. or something/

[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: The Smurfs have come a long way.
Me: La la lalala LA.

/Comedian lights cigar with flamethrower/

Both: :regress to thumbsucking stage:

[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: Don't pull out now!

/Adrian remembers fondly...while looking fucking fierce in a leather raincoat./

/Adrian and Eddie compare dick sizes. Laurie and Jon make googly eyes at each other. Dan doesn't know what the fuck is going on. Rorschach bitches. Janey seethes./

Me: Will you two just FUCK already? Christ on a Triscuit.
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: Who would top?
Me: BOTH OF THEM. And wait 'til you see what Adrian has planned for that cigar.

/Eddie sets Adrian's 5th grade class U.S. map on fire/

Adrian: RUDE.
Eddie: Suck my dick; I don't give a fuck.
Adrian: :whimpers:
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: :whimpers:

/Enter looming official-looking movie employee guy. He looms loomingly./

Me: Be cool! Be cool!
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: Just breathe. We're in our thirties -- and we're about to be thrown out of the theatre. WTF.
Me: I WILL NOT MISS ADRIAN'S VERBAL SMACKDOWN. BE COOL.
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: 'K.

/Dan remembers fondly/

/Eddie jumps from Archie into 70s riot crowd. Apparently they're pissed off about the local store being out of afro picks, idk. Eddie has to chill them the fuck out./

Both: :DIE A MILLION LITTLE DEATHS:
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: I'm down for that police action.

/LEGENDARY VERBAL SMACKDOWN SCENE/





Both: jdlfksajd'ajf'laskjf;laskfjas;lkfjaslfkjaslfkjaslgkjas;dglkajs

[DUDE. I SERIOUSLY DON'T EVEN REMEMBER WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT RIGHT NOW. jflaskjfa;lskfjs;l]

[livejournal.com profile] mightyfrodite: purplesuitpurplesuitpurplesuit :rocks:

Adrian: "DON'T BITE DOWN YOU SONOFABITCH!"

Me: :EXPLODES:
[livejournal.com profile] mightyfrodite: :shoes burn off:

/official looming man is frightened away by SQUEE POWERRRR!TM/

/A whole lot of other shit happens...Adrian poisons the Veidt Glee Club...and then the climactic [HAHAHAHAHA CLIMAX] showdown./

Me: Dan's winter suit has little fur tuffs on the ears!
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: ICKLE!

[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: Ozy's suit has nipples. NIPPLES.
Me: I'm going to send the costume designer a gift basket. Of sex.
[livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite: And the Eye of Ra is over his crotch. His cock is a god. RAIN DOWN ON ME.
Me: SPLURT SPLURT.

The pair of us pretty much melted into puddles of complete incoherence at that point. Adrian movie-fucked us 35 minutes ago, and we're STILL feeling it.

I'm officially addicted to this movie. When it finally does come out on DVD, I'm going to buy it TWICE.

:passes out:

Date: 2009-04-05 07:56 am (UTC)
das_hydra: (watchmen - chisels)
From: [personal profile] das_hydra
...there aren't sufficient words for how amusing you two are.

Date: 2009-04-05 08:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mightyafrodite.livejournal.com
:D

It took about an hour to get from the theater to the front door of the house.

Date: 2009-04-05 02:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sexyscholar.livejournal.com
What can I say? I'm a giver.

Date: 2009-04-05 08:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pixvix.livejournal.com
Damn now I wanna go see it again!!! No one wants to sit in the theater with me because I have fucking seizures whenever Adrian talks or walks or fucks Ziggy Stardust with a simple handshake.....

/Enter looming official-looking movie employee guy. He looms loomingly./

All I can say is bitch please! He never stood a chance of getting ya'll out of that movie theater.

Date: 2009-04-05 09:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mightyafrodite.livejournal.com
Hells no. Once you are under the power of the Orgozym, you cannot be stopped.

Date: 2009-04-05 03:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mightyafrodite.livejournal.com
That's the best way for me to describe it!

Date: 2009-04-05 03:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sexyscholar.livejournal.com
At least you came up with a term. All I can ever think of is ks;laksdl;aksd;laskd;laskfa;lskf.

Date: 2009-04-05 02:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sexyscholar.livejournal.com
No one wants to sit in the theater with me because I have fucking seizures whenever Adrian talks or walks or fucks Ziggy Stardust with a simple handshake.....

If we were any closer to Alabama, we'd totally go see it with you. I don't understand how a person could *not* go into seizures when Adrian is on the screen. Seriously.

Date: 2009-04-05 01:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ryl.livejournal.com
Me: Is it bad that I find this profoundly arousing? Put down the pad!
[info]mightyafrodite: Huh? Wha--oooh. No, I don't think it's bad at all. Unbuckle faster, damn you!
Me: Hooded Justice, if you're not going to join in then you need to bounce.
[info]mightyafrodite: Grab the rope!
Me: Now it's a PARTY.


<333333333333333333 BOTH OF YOU

Date: 2009-04-05 03:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mightyafrodite.livejournal.com
I'm so glad more people than just the two of us think we're funny. :p

Date: 2009-04-05 03:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sexyscholar.livejournal.com
We <333333333333333333 you too, BB.

It's why we do this. ♥

Date: 2009-04-08 12:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ryl.livejournal.com
OH HELL YES.
COMEDIAN TREATING OZY LIKE THE BITCH HE IS.
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Date: 2009-04-08 01:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sexyscholar.livejournal.com
I thought you might enjoy that one. :)

Date: 2009-04-05 09:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] greyyguy.livejournal.com
I don't know if you read io9.com but they just linked to this site:
http://destiny.ponderosa121.com/

I thought you might be interested in it :)

Date: 2009-04-05 11:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sexyscholar.livejournal.com
I can't look at it right now -- kids are EVERYWHERE -- but I will check it out later. Thanks for the link.

You're always looking out for me. :p

Date: 2009-04-08 03:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] happyville.livejournal.com
I'm assuming you have already, but if you haven't...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Di0yBtI3kYM

cherrybomb promo. UNF FOREVER.

Date: 2009-04-08 03:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sexyscholar.livejournal.com
OMGGGGGGGGGOD YES. I just watched it, and was in the middle of posting it when I got your reply, lol!

They have GOT to release this in the U.S. THEY JUST HAVE TO.

Date: 2009-04-12 06:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thrihyrne.livejournal.com
Late to this, but you're hilarious. I still don't think I'll ever see Watchmen, but your take on it with all of the sexiness makes me love you all the more.

((((massive hugs))))

Date: 2009-04-12 03:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sexyscholar.livejournal.com
And it only got worse on the ride home. I truly did feel like I'd been given two and a half hours of foreplay. :/

Sexual attraction to a movie -- and not even to a Rupert movie? THAT'S CRAZY.

The sad part is that [livejournal.com profile] mightyafrodite and I seriously considered seeing it *again* this weekend. It's getting harder, though, since it's slowly making its way out of theatres. :sobs:

I will probably try to see it again one more time, if I'm able - if only for the verbal smackdown scene. I'm hopelessly drawn to Adrian's arrogant purple sex candy like the proverbial moth to its flame(thrower).

Date: 2009-04-18 07:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] exuberantself.livejournal.com
Don't worry. I saw the movie five times before banning myself from the cinema for the sake of being able to afford electricity.

Is the bit where he takes out the would be assassin not, like, the sexiest thing EVER?

Date: 2009-04-19 01:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sexyscholar.livejournal.com
I was sorely tempted to see it again this weekend but, like you, I need electricity and such. If only the kids didn't need to eat... :p

Is the bit where he takes out the would be assassin not, like, the sexiest thing EVER?

DUDE. CinemaxUncensored has that scene in a clip they did on the movie, and I watch that any time I need an Adrian fix, which is almost DAILY at this point. It never fails to leave me incoherent for several minutes.

And the "35 minutes ago" line? I just... I lost my mind.

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