fic: the only thing i ever wanted

[sexyscholar]

eeeeep.

my first tamaki/kyouya fic.

:is nervous:

Title: The Only Thing I Ever Wanted
Author: sexyscholar
Fandom: Ouran High School (Koukou) Host Club
Pairing: Tamaki/Kyouya
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: ~4000
Summary: PWP. The Host Club is on holiday, Tamaki is AWOL, and Kyouya feels a little out of sorts.
A/N: A zillion thanks to icanhaspancake you scheming, enabling temptress for helping it all make sense and for holding my hand & convincing me to finish this when I just wanted to shoot it in the face. Oh. And it’s smut of course, because apparently I’m wholly incapable of thinking undirty thoughts.



~*~*~

Kyouya shifted in his lounging chair and lifted his beloved computer off of his lap. The whirring mechanics inside had warmed the bottom of it, and despite the balmy summer weather, he could easily distinguish the source of the stinging heat on his thighs. Once he’d cooled a bit, he set it back down and let his eyes drift to the lower right hand corner of the screen for the nth time. It was late in the afternoon, after four o’clock, and Tamaki was still nowhere to be seen. “Where the hell is he?” he muttered.

Hikaru and Kaoru were lying out on a large blanket on the sand with their eyes closed, their long legs tangled around each other. “Where’s who? You mean Boss?” one of them asked.

Kyouya pushed a lock of black hair out of his eyes. “It doesn’t matter,” he said.

“He’s probably still out sightseeing with Haruhi.”

“I don’t know how much else there is to see. This is Goza -- there’s not a lot to do around here.”

The Host Club had decided bring along a select group of their most loyal clients with them on a special vacation to Goza Shirahama Beach, an isolated strip of white sand and smooth, emerald-green water in Ise-Shima.

Hikaru sat up. “Well, maybe not in Goza, but there’s plenty to see on Shima: the shrines, the aquarium, the amusement parks,” he said with building excitement.

Kaoru continued the thought. “And you know the boss. He’ll want to see everything, twice if he can.”

Kyouya adjusted his glasses. Oh yes, he knew the Prince. He knew Tamaki better than the rest of the Host Club ever could.

His mind drifted back to the many excursions all over Japan that Tamaki had dragged him on during the first few weeks of their friendship. At the behest of his critical father, Kyouya was determined to befriend the Suoh heir, and in trying to win over the other boy, had become his overwrought tour companion. The goofy blond, like so many other foreigners, was fascinated by Japanese culture and had insisted on seeing everything there was to see.

Back then, Kyouya had been reasonably certain that Tamaki was going to drive him insane with his endless enthusiasm and ridiculous notions and sudden flights of fancy, but now the teenager smiled inwardly at the memory of all of the things about Tamaki that he had taken for granted.

He shook off the memory and spoke in his normal cool and authoritative tone. “Well, he should be here -- not off with Haruhi.”

“You sure do care an awful lot about how Tamaki and Haruhi spend their time,” Kaoru teased.

Kyouya responded with a quiet “hmph” and continued to work, never looking away from his laptop.

Hikaru bobbed his head in agreement. “He’s right, Kyouya. You’re even more uptight than usual since they’ve been gone.” The mischievous redhead leaned over to Kyouya. “Is Mommy very upset with Daddy?” he whispered.

Kyouya pushed his wire-framed glasses back to his face. “I’m not upset, you nitwit. There were heartbroken clients who’d been waiting for him all day. I had to use money from the vacation budget to buy bouquets of flowers for all of the girls and tell them they were from him. Luckily the florist is well-acquainted with my father’s business, so he sold them to me for a modest price.”

Kaoru rose up and tucked his chin on his brother’s shoulder. “Then it sounds like you’ve taken care of everything,” he said.

“So what’s the harm in having some fun?” Hikaru tapped a finger against his lips. “We are on vacation, after all,” he said, turning to his brother.

Kaoru grinned impishly. “I bet he’s mad because he likes Haruhi.”

“No, I don’t,” Kyouya said. The twins didn’t acknowledge him, though -- they went on as if he’d never said a word, discussing their theory.

“That makes sense -- Haruhi is very pretty in her own way, even if she’s got a flat chest.” Both twins snickered at that.

“Don’t talk about her like that -- it’s crude.”
“So you do like her...”

“No, I don’t,” the dark-haired boy reiterated.

“You don’t?” The twins’ mouths opened in a dual, mocking gasp. “Do you hate her, Kyouya?”

Kyouya was exasperated. “No, of course I don’t hate her. Will you two go away?”

“Why should we have to go away?”

“It’s a public beach,” Hikaru added.

“Fine.” Kyouya pinched the bridge of his nose -- the twins could really be insufferable sometimes. He saved his work and switched off his laptop, folding it closed with a click. The boy rose from his lounge chair and gathered his things. “I’m going to my room,” he grumbled.

“Well, if we see Tamaki...” Hikaru said.

“...we’ll tell him to come find you,” Kaoru finished for him.

“Don’t bother,” Kyouya said, walking past the pair. “Tamaki can do whatever he wants. He always does.”

“Wow,” he heard one of the twins say as he left the beach. “Mommy must be really upset with Daddy.”

Kyouya pretended not to hear them as he tromped through the sand as he made his way back to the hotel overlooking the beach.

~*~*~

Later that evening, Kyouya was still agitated. He’d been upstairs for hours, watching the golden hue of afternoon fade into evening. The entire day had gone by, and there’d been no sign of Tamaki or Haruhi. The idea that they were still out together made him feel prickly in his own skin.

Kyouya walked to the window and opened it, allowing the cool, salty evening breeze from the water to waft into his room. He looked down on the sand and could easily make out Kaoru, Hikaru and Honey circled around a glowing campfire with some of the girls who’d come with them, laughing and carrying on and, frustrated, he stepped away from the window and plunked down on the bed. He took off his glasses, setting them on the mattress beside him, and ran his fingers through his hair.

He hated this, hated feeling like everything was flittering about, just out of his reach where he was unable to control any of it. Damn that Tamaki, Kyouya’s inner monologue rambled. Damn his energy and his smile and his openness and those stupid violet eyes...

Kyouya lay down on the bed and closed his eyes. “You’ve got to get a hold of yourself,” he mumbled.

“You really do,” a voice said from his doorway. “If you talk to yourself, it’s only a matter of time before you start interrupting, and then we’ve got real problems. I don’t know that a ‘schizophrenic’ type would be all that popular with clients…but then you never know, right?”

Kyouya pulled himself back to a sitting position and slid his glasses on.

When his vision refocused, he saw Tamaki leaning against the doorjamb, dressed in a simple shirt and shorts. His skin was tinged pink, and Kyouya suspected that the other boy had spent the entire day outside without sunscreen…again. He’d undone the first few buttons of the shirt and Kyouya felt as though he’d been robbed of his breath. He coughed into his hands.

“Are you alright?” Tamaki asked. “You’re not coming down with a cold, are you? Summer colds are the worst.” He came into the room and shut the door, making his way over to the other boy, and pressed his palm tenderly to Kyouya’s forehead. “You do feel a little warm -- do you want me to get a doctor?”

Kyouya reached up and batted Tamaki away. “I’m fine. What are you doing here?”

The blond shrugged. “Do I need a reason to come see you?”

“I suppose not...but I’m starting to get tired,” he lied. “What do you want?”

“Oh, I wanted to tell you about my day,” Tamaki said happily. His heart-shaped face lit up, and Kyouya felt as though a stone had dropped in his stomach. “We had a great time! We went to the market, and I got to eat pork bone-flavored ramen -- real commoner ramen, Kyouya!”

“Your fascination with commoners’ lifestyle frightens me, Tamaki.”

“Well, that wasn’t all we did. We went on the subway and it was so crowded -- I thought I was going to get crushed flat at every stop we made...”

Kyouya turned away from the other boy. He really didn’t want to hear about how much fun he’d had with someone else. He just wanted him to go away.

“Kyouya, are you listening to me?”

The boy turned around to find Tamaki standing close beside him, almost too close. Kyouya could see that Tamaki’s shirt was wickedly thin -- the two small and surprisingly dark circles of his areolae were barely visible under the flimsy material. Kyouya looked away, his face hot and betraying. “Not really,” he mumbled, taking particularly special care to get the minimal bits of dirt out from beneath his fingernails. “It’s late -- you should go.”

Tamaki pouted. “But I wanted to see you.”

“Well, now you’ve seen me,” Kyouya said, his voice tight.

“What’s the matter? I wanted to tell you about my great day, and all you want to do is make me sad.”

Kyouya bit his tongue. Keeping Tamaki at arm’s length like this was killing him, but he didn’t know what else to do. Every nerve in his body was crackling with energy from Tamaki’s very presence, and he couldn’t make it stop.

“Mommy--” The blond reached out and touched Kyouya’s shoulder.

“Don’t call me that,” Kyouya snapped, wrenching his body away.

“Why are you so angry at me?”

“I’m angry because you should have been here today -- clients were asking after you, and they were disappointed when I had to tell them you weren’t going to be there. I thought you’d be more responsible, but I guess I was wrong. You were just being you -- oblivious to everyone else.”

Tamaki’s wide eyes skimmed with tears. “I’m sorry. I... I didn’t realize I’d let so many people down.” The boy sat down next to Kyouya and rested his head against his shoulder. “Please don’t be angry with me anymore.” Tamaki’s warm breath brushed on his neck, and Kyouya froze. It wasn’t the first time Tamaki and he had been this close, but the gentle contact, mingled with Kyouya’s raw and tangled feelings, sent a shock through him that went all the way down to his toes. “I could stand anyone being mad at me but you, Kyouya.”

“It’s late, Tamaki,” Kyouya replied lamely. He tried to lean away, to create space between them, but Tamaki wouldn’t budge.

“Kyouya?”

“Yes?”

“Why do you keep trying to get rid of me?” His tone was so innocent, so oblivious to Kyouya’s torment that the other boy finally lost it.

“Because I thought we were going to spend time together -- but you’ve been off with Haruhi since we got here,” Kyouya blurted out angrily.

Tamaki made an odd face. “Huh?”

Kyouya was surprised by his unexpected outburst, and he stammered to recover. “I--no--just go.”

“Wait,” Tamaki said, realization blooming on his face. “Do you think--?”

“I don’t think anything.”

“Yes, you do!” Tamaki exclaimed, grinning and pointing a finger at Kyouya. “You think I like Haruhi, don’t you?” He slinked an arm around Kyouya’s waist, gathering his body closer to him. “Come on -- you know how I feel about you. You know it’s always you. Don’t you?”

“I know no such thing -- now let me go,” Kyouya protested, albeit weakly.

“I don’t think I can do that, Ootori-kun.” Tamaki’s tone was light and playful as he leaned forward and brushed his lips against the shell of Kyouya’s ear. “Especially when it makes you blush like that,” he continued. He cupped the dark-haired boy’s cheek and turned his head so they were facing one another.

Kyouya felt a bit lightheaded and his heart was hammering a hard rhythm beneath his ribs. “Tamaki…”

The blond didn’t wait for him to finish his sentence. He seized the moment, pressing his pink mouth to Kyouya’s in a soft kiss. His tongue slid forward and flicked at the other boy’s lips.

Kyouya returned the gesture, darting his own tongue out to meet somewhere in the middle. His hands slid up Tamaki’s arms and around his back, gripping his shirt in his fists as he held him tight. “I’ve missed you so much,” he rasped against the other boy’s mouth as he tugged at the back of his shirt, pulling it up and up and up until his fingers finally met with warm, bare skin.

Tamaki moaned his agreement. His hands were on their own quest, inching up and under the front of Kyouya’s shirt while he peppered his mouth with kisses. “I’ve missed you too,” he said, his lips only a breath away. He pinched one of Kyouya’s nipples between his thumb and index finger. “Can I?”

“You better,” Kyouya answered, smirking at Tamaki before capturing his mouth in a fiery kiss. The blond growled softly -- it was a sound Kyouya had never heard before, and the honesty and urgency of it made his cock twitch under his shorts. He fell backward on the mattress, bringing Tamaki with him.

They broke their kiss just long enough to situate themselves on the bed - Tamaki nestled on top of the other boy, nudging his thigh between Kyouya’s legs - and then their mouths were locked together again, biting and licking and sucking until their lips were swollen. Tamaki brushed wisps of black hair from his forehead. Kyouya reached for his glasses to take them off, but Tamaki stopped him. “No, I want you to see me clearly. At least for a little while.”

Only moments before, Kyouya’s heart felt as though it was folding in on itself, but now...now the object of his every affection was lying on top of him, unbuttoning his shirt and running his fingers down the center of his chest -- silently assuring him that everything was alright. Kyouya pressed his fingertip to Tamaki’s soft, wet mouth and the blond took them away, running his lips over the knuckles before giving them the barest hint of a kiss. “I’ll be right back.”

Tamaki got off of the bed, and Kyouya sat up, unsettled at the loss of the other boy’s warmth. “Where are you going?”

“Locking the door -- I’d hate for anyone to come in now, wouldn’t you?”

“Good point.”

Sooner than Kyouya expected, Tamaki was there again, kneeling between his thighs. The blond squeezed the bulge at Kyouya’s crotch, making the other boy writhe against the mattress. “Tamaki,” he moaned.

“You’re awfully warm here, too.” Tamaki looked up at him -- his pupils had dilated, changing his eyes to a dark, midnight blue.

“Do you want to call the doctor now?” Kyouya asked breathlessly.

“We could just play doctor instead,” the blond answered, giving Kyouya a wink and unbuttoning his pants, tugging at them, along with his underwear - Kyouya arched his back and shimmied his hips, helping to wriggle out of the restrictive garments - until they were crumpled around his ankles.

Kyouya’s length smacked lightly against his lean stomach before it eased back up and wagged slightly in the air, lust and longing having turned it a dark shade of pink. “Touch me, Daddy,” he whispered, his long fingers clawing out and gripping Tamaki’s shoulders.

The blond reached out and rubbed the pad of his thumb over the head of Kyouya’s prick and the dark-haired boy shivered at the touch. Tamaki stoked it again, swirling his fingers around and around the ridge and coating it with a layer of the slick, clear fluid that had seeped from the glans.

Tamaki’s touch was maddening, and Kyouya didn’t think that anything could possibly feel better than what he was doing right now. He moaned helplessly, sniffling a little.

“Are you alright?” the other boy asked, crawling up so that his hips were hovering over Kyouya’s.

Kyouya shifted up onto his elbows. “Are you serious?”

Tamaki flashed his dazzling smile -- he was obviously pleased with himself. “Shut up, Kyouya.” He rubbed his hands over Kyouya’s bare thighs, tracing coiling lines along the milky skin. He moved forward and kissed a path up the inner seam of his left thigh, approaching the narrowing vee of Kyouya’s crotch. The dark-haired boy fretted for a moment -- it had been a hot day and he hadn’t showered since that morning -- but his fear evaporated when Tamaki’s tongue slithered wetly over the crown of his cock before sucking it into his warm mouth.

“Oh...oh, Daddy,” Kyouya whimpered, out of his head with desire, and he felt his face grow hot. Tamaki’s mouth felt like heaven, sliding endlessly around his prick, while wicked fingers edged closer and closer to his anus. Kyouya felt the press against his body - he wanted it, craved it, and he pushed his hips downward, hoping that Tamaki would understand.

“Hang on -- I bought something while I was in town today.”

“Tamaki...” Kyouya groaned, frustrated and achingly hard.

“I think you’ll like this.” Tamaki leaned back on his haunches and shoved his hand into his pocket. A few seconds later, he fished out a small clear bottle. He uncapped the top, tilted the tiny vial into his hand and a clear, viscous-looking gel burbled out onto his fingers.

Kyouya bit his lower lip. “Is that...is that what I think it is?”

Tamaki nodded. “I had to distract Haruhi so that I could get it, but yeah. And I think it’ll be worth it.” He pushed a slick digit -- or maybe two...Kyouya was so drunk with desire that he really couldn’t be sure -- into his entrance, and then laid himself back down between Kyouya’s legs and went back to sucking his cock.

Kyouya struggled to keep his eyes open so he could watch Tamaki’s head bob purposefully between his spread and damp legs, but it was becoming harder to do so. The gel that Tamaki had poured out onto his fingers has started out cool to the touch, but it had begun to warm inside his channel and Kyouya’s muscles were spasming around the wriggly intrusion. He gripped his manicured nails hard into Tamaki’s exposed shoulders, leaving behind a staggered arrangement of white crescents glaring white-hot on his reddening skin. It was all so hot and dirty and perfect and then, without warning, Tamaki pulled his wonderful mouth away and Kyouya’s world grinded to a halt.

“Why...did you stop?” he croaked.

“Because,” the blond said with a naughty glint in his eyes, “I want to see you.” He licked the palm of his hand, curled it around Kyouya’s shaft and began to tug at him quickly.

Kyouya wailed, forgetting all pretenses of composure as he drowned out the lewd smack of skin against skin, and pushed up hard into Tamaki’s firm clutch. His face twisted into an expression of deep concentration -- he could feel his nearing orgasm drawing energy from every cell in his body. He opened his mouth to cry out again, but Tamaki pushed another finger inside of him, stretching him even further, and the sound died in his throat.

“I like you so much, Kyouya...”

There was something plain and beautiful in Tamaki’s voice at that moment, and it destroyed Kyouya’s tenuous control. He moaned long and loud when he came -- his body shaking as milky fluid bubbled from the tip of his cock and drizzled over Tamaki’s long, gripping fingers.

The blond lapped gently at the head of Kyouya’s spent cock, removing his slick fingers as he did so, and raised his head. He climbed out from between Kyouya’s thighs and knee-walked up the bed, and then straddled the other man’s heaving torso. He bent over and kissed him, sliding his swollen, salty-bitter tongue into Kyouya’s mouth.

The sultry kiss finally ended and Tamaki pulled back, a satisfied smile across his lips. Kyouya felt like lead, heavy and tired, and he could have easily rolled over and gone to sleep, but... He looked up at Tamaki kneeling above him -- the other boy’s cheeks were a rosy pink, his eyes wide and excited and hopeful, and Kyouya was struck with a sudden desire to reciprocate. He smoothed his hand over the bulge tenting the buttoned front of Tamaki’s trousers and then set his hands on the blond’s hips and pulled him forward to run his tongue over his clothed erection. Tamaki whimpered, then giggled, and then quickly unfastened his belt, shoving down his pants just enough so that his prick could stand out from its nest of soft, dark blond curls.

Kyouya leaned forward and licked the underside of Tamaki’s cock, dragging his tongue along its length and then closing his mouth over the tip. Thin, slightly salty fluid dripped onto his tongue, and Kyouya licked at experimentally before he blew a hard breath through his nose and pushed his mouth down the veined shaft. His eyes began to water, and he felt a sudden rush of thick saliva swirl in his mouth. He pulled away to take another breath, letting a string of saliva linger between his lip and the head.

Tamaki shuddered and pushed himself into Kyouya’s mouth. “That feels so good, Kyouya,” he said quietly, carding his fingers through the other boy’s dark hair. It wasn’t long before he started to thrust in earnest, babbling something about “God” and “don’t stop.”

His enthusiastic response prompted Kyouya to double his efforts, and he clasped his hands around Tamaki’s length, holding it as he let it slip in and out of his mouth, determined to hold the blond there until the very end.

Tamaki swayed forward, almost falling on Kyouya. “Kyouya,” he panted with a hint of what sounded like awe, “your mouth...so hot. Can’t ho--oh God...” He made a sharp, hiccup-like sound and slammed into Kyouya’s mouth once more and let out a long groan, shooting semen onto Kyouya’s tongue in ropey strands. Tamaki’s ejaculate was hot and bitter, and Kyouya’s throat closed reflexively, making him gag around his mouthful.

Chest heaving, Tamaki pulled back; his half-hard length slipped wetly from between Kyouya’s lips. “Sorry...”

The dark-haired boy, an undignified mess of saliva and semen and sweat, couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled out from his throat. “You should be -- look at me.”

“I kind of like that look on you, to be honest.” Tamaki took off his shirt and pants and let them fall to the ground.

Kyouya wiped his mouth with his sleeve. “What are you doing?”

“What does it look like? I’m going to bed.” He stepped out of the puddle of clothing around his feet and climbed, bare assed, into Kyouya’s bed. Once he was under the covers, he patted the space next to him. “What are you waiting for?”

“You have your own bed.”

“But I’ll sleep better next to you,” Tamaki said with a pout.

“Fine.” Kyouya stood up and finished undressing, and then climbed into bed with Tamaki. The blond snuggled up against him almost immediately, pressing his chest to Kyouya’s back and slipping a hand over his hip.

“Mommy?”

“Yes, Daddy?”

“I was thinking...” Tamaki’s voice was muffled against Kyouya’s shoulder. “I haven’t been to the amusement park yet.”

“No.”

The blond ignored him. “We could go tomorrow, just the two of us. It’ll be fun.”

Kyouya made a face. “I hate amusement parks,” he said. “The rides and all that greasy food always make me sick.”

“They have one of those tunnels of love...”

“Tamaki?” Kyouya asked.

“Yes?”

“If I agree to this, will you shut up and let me sleep?”

“Mmhmm!” He could feel Tamaki quickly nodding his head against his back.

Kyouya sighed. “Then I’ll go.”

Tamaki squirmed against him and tightened his hold. “Thank you, Kyouya,” he said with a yawn.

Minutes later, Kyouya heard Tamaki’s soft snore and felt warm breaths of air puffing in a slow rhythm against his skin.

Confident that the other boy was asleep, he took the blond’s hand in his and kissed the back of it. “I’ll go anywhere you want, Tamaki,” he said whispered. “Always.”